amarielah replied to your post “amarielah replied to your post “Do you ever decide to hunt down a…”I’ve been reading fanfic since I was 9/10, so trust me when I say: I get it. I used to be obsessed with those interactive “ask X character” fics.
I was young enough that - and I remember this vividly - I came across a “you must be 18 to proceed” warning after the third or so chapter of a fic and was extremely disappointed that I’d have to wait over a decade to finish reading it. Like I don’t think it even occurred to me to lie and click through it (in hindsight, that was probably very lucky).
You almost certainly dodged a bullet. Absolutely horrifying Leia/Jabba fic was one of my first fic experiences.
I had my only Star Wars dream ever this morning
I was naked.. as Obi-Wan Kenobi.
It was kind of weird
- Ewan McGregor
So there’s been a lot of meta flying around here about how hardcore Padme would be in a AU where she survives RotS, and how—having finally become done with Vader’s shit—she would recognize his emotional weaknesses and be able to play on them, etc.
And that’s all very interesting, obviously, but I’m also intrigued by what would have happened when Padme finally came out of denial about Anakin’s issues in a situation that didn’t involve the extreme situation of RotS. She’d mostly managed to ignore the problems in their relationship because they hardly ever saw each other, and never for long periods of time—but what if the war ended? What if they suddenly could spend enough time together that they passed out of the honeymoon phase of their relationship and had to learn how to actually be married?
Things like the Clovis arc reveal that Padme was, on some level, aware of Anakin’s problems. They kiss and make up at the end of the arc, sure, but without resolving the underlying issue—and I can’t imagine Padme Amidala allowing that sort of issue to stay unresolved if it came up again in a situation where she could think about the long-term prospects of their relationship without the knowledge that he’d just be going off to war again soon anyways hanging over her head.
In an AU where Anakin and Padme had the chance to spend prolonged amount of time in each other’s company, where she was exposed to the depth of his issues (even just by being with him on a day-to-day basis, as opposed to seeing him murder people and go totally off the deep end), I don’t think it would take too long for her to get to a point where she was calling him out. If the war had ended and she didn’t need the marriage as an escape from her own difficult reality, I think she’d be better prepared to face its problems and work on making their relationship more sustainably functional.
(Anakin…Anakin’s denial runs a little deeper. He does want to please Padme, which would help, but getting him to act in healthier ways just to keep someone he loves happy only solves half the problem).
I agree and I especially think that making it work would become a priority for her. Let’s pretend the Republic is actually reformed, the Sith are gone, the Jedi are rethinking that “no attachments” thing. So Anakin and Padme are just left with their own marital/trust issues and Anakin’s deep seated emotional issues. That’s when it gets tough, but I also think that’s when they would start to try their hardest to make it work. Anakin would want to change, but need a hell of a lot of help to figure out how.
I’m just imagining that they will make a therapist very, very rich.
padawankorra replied to your photoset “Hey, remember that time when Padme, faced with a choice between…”So many people capital d Do Not understand how hardcore Padmé Amidala is. Anakin himself included, to an extent.
Anakin definitely does not realize, I think. I always wonder how aware he was that Padme wasn’t the one to make the decision to exchange Grievous for him.
Can you imagine the conversation when he found out. Anakin often seems to expect that Padme reciprocate his prioritizing of their love/relationship over duty (see the Clovis arc), but to find out she’d been willing to risk his life….
That would not be a fun conversation for either of them. Though, if it had happened (and I would guess that in canon, it didn’t), it would possibly be rather illuminating.
Yeah, I would be really surprised if they had had their conversation, especially given the events in the Clovis arc. I bet that intellectually, Anakin is aware that Padme will probably prioritize her duty, but emotionally he’s stunned every time and not happy about that.
On one level, Anakin has always admired Padme’s commitment to her duty, and even the resistance she put up to beginning a relationship with him showed him that she’s not one to put it aside easily for the sake of love. So he would know that in all likelihood she was going to put her duty first…but subconsciously, he expects that she’ll find a way to do both (like he often manages), and he wants her to value him and their relationship more than anything else, even if he wouldn’t admit that to himself.
If there’s one thing about Anakin, it’s that he’s never truly content with anything. Padme doesn’t love him in the same way he loves her because she’s not willing to burn the galaxy down for him and, while I don’t think he values himself on that level, the disparity is something that makes his feelings for her more fraught than they need to be. He’s always on that seesaw, loving people for who they are and yet still wishing for more, wishing things were different somehow, feeling that having any priorities other than a loved one means the love isn’t quite real.
The discussion about if Padme and Anakin really understand the limits of how far the other will go for them is interesting because I think, as with many things having to do with Anakin, everyone is actually in complete denial about what Anakin would do (including Anakin himself). I think, on average, Light Side days, Anakin is perfectly aware that Padme wouldn’t sacrifice her morals for his sake. She will make the right call every time.
That’s why he wants her to be Empress. It’s something he admires and loves about her.
But with Anakin, he’s working doggedly on the Heroic Loophole. He doesn’t make the hard choices. We see him in TCW choosing to complete the mission AND save the person he loves — again and again. It’s what he does. He’s convinced that if he is just powerful enough, he’ll ride that wave forever without ever confronting how awful his judgment actually is and what he’d do when pushed to the breaking point (what he has already done).
And because Anakin gets the Heroic Loophole, Padme and Obi-Wan can pretend he’d make the right choice, if he ever had to. He just hasn’t had to so far and even in the circumstances where they thought he’d have to face a tough decision, it turned out he was right about his abilities. He actually is that good, it seems.
Do you ever think about your OTP having muffled, rough sex against a wall
Because I do
Sometimes I forget how totally married Anakin and Obi-Wan are. And then I watch Revenge of the Sith and it’s like oh yeah
Anakin married Obi-Wan without telling him and them dreamed up a symbol representing them and then painted it on everything.